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9 Toxic Thoughts That Crush Your Confidence

This article was last updated on December 29, 2015

We all struggle from time to time with motivation. Some struggle more than others. But what differentiates those who are motivated and follow through from others who stumble at the first roadblock and give up? How is it possible for some to stay motivated?

Most of our self talk is negative. We have these toxic thoughts that crush our confidence. This negative self talk causes us to feel unmotivated and it even can lead to depression. It is also the origin of self defeating behaviour. If we think that “I am not going to succeed anyway.” we do not put in the effort. This thought discourages us, and as a result of our inaction we bring about what we most dread.

So how can we change this? The first thing is to spot the thought the negative thought. The next step is to challenge our limiting thoughts and replace them with positive helpful ones that will propel us further.

We often think that our thoughts are facts, but in reality they are only our interpretation of the world around us or thoughts that we borrowed from others. That’s why you so often hear that you should surround yourself with like minded positive people, because they have an influence on your thinking, your mood and consequently on your actions.

It is not always easy to spot our negative thinking. But feeling discouraged, unmotivated, anxious is a good indication that our thinking is off.

Here are 9 thoughts you should watch out for:

9 Toxic Thoughts That Crush Your Confidence

1. “I am not an expert. Why would anyone listen to me?”

Do your friends ask you for advice? If your answer is yes, then you are an expert! If you are better than others in something, that qualifies you as an expert in their eyes.

And you can always acquire new skills and knowledge. In fact we should constantly aim to better ourselves. So even if you still think that you are not an expert, I want you to know that you can become one if you choose to.

2. “I do not have any credentials.”

We often think of credentials as diplomas, certifications issued by a higher authority, testifying that we are good enough. For some occupations it is required by the law that you have a diploma, but those are the minority. For most online entrepreneurs … you do not need anyone’s permission other than yourself. So can you give yourself the permission to become what you want to become? And think of it, what could be better credential than raving fans of yours who give you testimonial on how you helped them to solve their problems?

3. “My idea is already taken.”

Did it already happen to you that you had a business idea and found that somebody is already doing it, therefore you abandoned that idea? What if I tell you that it is a good sign that somebody is already doing it? It shows that there is demand for it. You can learn a lot by observing how it is done. You will bring your own spin into it, so don’t worry that it will be exactly the same.

4. “I am too young.”

Compared to whom? What if being young is an advantage?

What if this is just an excuse for not starting out? Will Mitchell from started skipping school to build businesses in the sixth grade. The thought “I am too young” often simply means that “I do not have any experience”. But how do you want to build up the experience if you do not start out?

5. “I am too old.”

Really? Undoubtedly somebody who is more senior has plenty of knowledge and skills which are very well transferable to start a business.

But that thought “I am too old” often hides a deeper belief, which is “I cannot change any more.”

Sue Anne Dunlevie from changed her career at the age of 55 and began her online business.

6. “It doesn’t work where I live.”

That can be a favourite for anybody who does not live in the US. Even more so if it is not an English speaking country. In the case of an online business, yes, one needs a sizeable market. But the beauty of lifestyle entrepreneurship is that it is location independent. Serving the US market does not require you to be physically in the US. Check out Bushra Azhar Persuasion Strategist from, she is from Pakistan and lives in Saudi Arabia.

7. “I am not a native speaker.”

This is my favourite. You guessed why. Because I believed it myself. Because most of the content online is in English, you need a good command of the language, but you do not need to be a native speaker. Navis Moazzez, the virtual summit expert from is Swedish and admitted that he had his doubt when he started out.

8. “What will others say?”

We always look for love approval and appreciation from others. It is normal, it’s human. But do you really know what others think? Even if they say something there is no guarantee that they really mean it. If you do something unusual, and for most people a lifestyle business is unusual, they feel threatened by the change, so they want to keep you where you are.

9. “I usually do not follow through.”

Well if you have read my article so far, than you do follow through :) Kudos to you. What if building a business wouldn’t be any different? One little step at the time, tracking your progress and adjusting.

Can you add any other thoughts to this list? Or even better share any limiting beliefs around starting a lifestyle business and how you overcame it. Would love to read your comment.

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