This article was last updated on September 5, 2017
There can be a time in our lives when we feel empty, hollow and removed from the rest of the humanity. We believe that we are cut off from our friends, no one cares about us or understands us, and there is nobody to ask for support or rely on. This terrible and gloomy feeling has a name – loneliness. When you hear from someone “I feel lonely,” you have an image in your head of this person eating supper alone in a cold kitchen or struggling to drink the glass of water during illness and no one is there to help. What does this mean if a person is feeling lonely? This is a very subjective emotion that doesn’t necessarily mean that this person in complete isolation from other people.
They can be married, work among a crowd of colleagues, have hundreds of friends but still feel lonely. Even at a party among others and fun, people can feel separated and distant from everything. This is our fear of being alone, not loved, left, not cared about. Don’t panic if you have recognized your own behavior – this feeling is pretty common and normal. Though if it prevents someone from living a normal life and causes a lot of distress, several simple guidelines can be followed to provide an answer to this repeating annoying question “How not to feel lonely?”
How to cope with loneliness?
Loneliness is not the scariest thing in the world. However, if neglected it can provoke drastic consequences – depression, physical pain or other mental disorders. It’s important to deal with it in a healthy way as it shouldn’t influence or be too pervasive in your life. There are two types of loneliness – acute and chronic subjective loneliness. The first case can be caused by sudden changes, for instance, the death of loved ones, moving to another city, etc. These changes are so rapid that the person needs some time to adjust to them and in the process suffer from separation. The second type is much more dangerous. It can badly alter someone’s life and social interactions. If the situation is constantly getting worse and nothing helps you, it’s advisable to contact a professional to get some help.
If this is a mild but nasty feeling, you can mend the situation yourself – this is a list of steps to lessen and eventually get rid of this problem.
They will explain to you how not to feel lonely and alter your situation for the better.
- Don’t deny your feelings. If you are aware of your loneliness, you can find the roots of this problem. Then you can find a relevant solution to lessen your troubles. If you are aware of the reasons of your gloomy mood – act, do whatever is needed to cope with this terrible feeling.
- Realize the difference between being lonely with simply being alone. Sometimes these two situations can be confused. When someone is alone, this doesn’t automatically mean that it is something inappropriate, some people just like solitude and like to spend some of their free time without other people.
- Find a trusted friend with whom it’s possible to can your thoughts and someone who will be around if needed. Perhaps you already have one but have been too withdrawn and immersed into your inner world to notice.
- Keep a diary to express your worries and anxieties. This is a good way to track your thoughts – whenever you ask yourself “Why do I feel lonely?” write down your answers to understand what can be done to improve the situation.
- Don’t neglect your personality and personal growth. If you intend to live to the fullest, don’t it at home crying because no one loves you. Go outside, find a hobby, do some sport, visit concerts, invite guests, travel, get a pet – numerous possibilities are given to those who want to meet new people plus to bring a bit of color into their life!
- Overcome the negative thinking. It’s a bad choice to spend all your time under the burden of depressing thoughts. If you really want to help yourself, you should start from your attitude. Weight up what you can do to alter the situation instead of concentrating on negative thoughts.
Why do I feel lonely?
The feeling of isolation is a complicated issue that can be caused by various reasons. These reasons vary greatly for different people, as we have different attitudes towards the same things. Something which seems lonely to one person can be quite ordinary and normal to another one. One of the most widespread origins of loneliness is the lack of personal communication. All our gadgets have the marvelous function to give an opportunity to communicate with people that can be far away. But, on the contrary, they make friends, close relatives and acquaintances more detached.
So before asking yourself “Why do I feel so alone?” try to meet a couple of friends and have a nice chat. While the number of friends grows on social networks, in reality, we are left only with a few ones if not completely alone. Being humans, we differ from each other greatly and sometimes just don’t fit in a particular environment. For example, those children in school that are bullied or adults that are discriminated against their skin complexion, origin, social background or sex. This kind of hostility can create the impression of being worthless and unnecessary.
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